Las Vegas Lawyer

Las Vegas Lawyer

Check out these Vegas Lawyer Joke images:

Pro Kayak Expedition
Vegas Lawyer Joke

Image by AlphaTangoBravo / Adam Baker
Anyone care to make a lawyer joke?

Knucklehead Self-Portrait
Vegas Lawyer Joke

Image by Caveman Chuck Coker
Not me, the engine is called a "knucklehead". But I’m in this photo three times.

Near the Colorado Belle, Laughlin, Nevada

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So it’s been a while since I’ve been on Flickr. I haven’t posted anything in the last 10 months. I haven’t been checking my Flickr mail, so there are people that have written to me and I have not responded. A few people have contacted my daughter, MommyWags, to see if I was okay. It’s nice to know I was missed and I apologize to everyone I didn’t respond to.

When I was last posting photos with any regularity, I was on a 7-week motorcycle trip around the United States.

While I was in Florida I started feeling a little bit under the weather. I assumed it was because of the 100°F temperatures with 100% humidity and tried not to pay too much attention to it. We have single-digit humidity where I live. I didn’t feel well all through the South and was looking forward to the low-humidity deserts. I reached the deserts and the temperatures went up into the 110°s and 120°s, but the humidity was low and that made it bearable. I still didn’t feel good and assumed it was the heat.

After reaching home, the first week I thought I was recuperating from being on the road so long. I had pretty much lost interest in everything during the rest and recuperation. However, a week, then two weeks, then three weeks went by and I never fully recovered from the trip.

I was getting numbness in my hands and feet. The symptoms that caused the most problems for me were dizziness, numbness, fatigue, slowed thinking, decreased concentration, decreased memory, blah, blah, blah. The mental symptoms were the hardest for me to deal with. People made jokes about memory problems and getting older, which got really irritating, but I reminded myself that it is ignorance and not malice, and tried to manage a laugh. Some forgetfulness comes from age, but not things like forgetting my kids’ names or forgetting common words in the middle of a sentence. I was having word problems leading to sentences like, "I’m going to go have another fish of coffee." Fish? Where the hell did that come from? I knew the word "cup" and what it meant, but how did "fish" get inserted into the sentence? Bizarre, how the mind works.

I started going through the approximately 8,000 photos I took during the trip when my computer died. That put a damper on my Internet access for a month or two. I managed to save everything from the old hard drive, but my photo software was no longer working. I had a program that used my GPS tracks to geotag my photos. I had another that renamed my photos to yyyymmdd_nnn (year month day sequential) format. My favorite quick edit software came with my camera and I have no idea where the CD is. Etc., etc., etc.

Eventually, I got another computer and got things mostly back to normal. But I missed my power tools.

After procrastinating a long time, I finally went to the doctor to see why I wasn’t recovering from the cross-country trip. I got poked and prodded and bled and x-rayed and hooked to test equipment and everything showed there was nothing wrong with me. Eventually a neurologist determined that I have multiple sclerosis. Oh, shit! When I started reading up on it, I found it’s not as scary as I thought it was. The neurologist also thought there were other things going on and the combination of things made diagnosis difficult.

I am still going to the doctor regularly and trying to figure out what is wrong with me. There comes a point where you don’t really care what is wrong, you just want to know what it is so you can deal with it and go on with life. Even bad news would be better than no news.

Just when you start to think that things can’t get any worse, someone proves you wrong. On New Year’s Eve, I was served with a summons saying I was being sued in federal court in Nevada for posting an excerpt and link to story in the Las Vegas Review-Journal newspaper. The people suing me wanted 0,000 and my domain name! Righthaven LLC is a group of lawyers that got the bright idea they could scour the Internet looking for things they could claim were copyright infringements, buy the copyrights from the newspaper, then sue the blogger for 0,000 as allowed by copyright law. Since it is prohibitively expensive to defend yourself in court, most people—primarily individuals and mom-and-pop businesses—had no choice but to settle for about ,000. Quick and easy money for a Copyright Troll. They’ve filed almost 300 lawsuits so far.

It’s an amazing story. You can read more about it at RighthavenLawsuits.com.

Fortunately, federal judges in Colorado (where Righthaven also partnered up with the Denver Post) and Nevada have seen through Righthaven’s tactics and realized that it is all a scam to use the courts as their personal ATMs. The judges have either put the lawsuits on hold (Colorado) or outright dismissed them (Nevada). Instead of protecting copyrights, Righthaven has succeeded in watering down copyright law, so newspapers now have less protection than before. The Nevada judges are considering sanctioning Righthaven and all the lawyers that participated in the scam. The Nevada state bar is also investigating the lawyers. Karma can be a real bitch!

So there you have it. In the past 10 months I haven’t been doing much of anything. I don’t even get out of the house much any more and that limits my photography opportunities. But I’m hoping that can all start changing and things can get back to semi-normality.

I have a lot of catching up to do on Flickr.

20110430_016a2_1024x768

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New Kindle with 1164 books INCLUDED & Wifi (part 1)

I have a new Kindle for sale for 5 that comes programed with 1164 books. Please see book list below. I also have an additional 200 books that can be programed onto the kindle. These books are all bought from Amazon.com and are around .00 per book. This is an AMAZING deal. You are getting over ,672 in Kindle books along with the Kindle itself. (the book list is too long to fit in this ad and books #601-1164 had to be taken out for space requirements, but are listed in the next craigslist ad labeled “New Kindle with 1164 books (part 2)) The kindle shown in the picture below is the exact kindle model that is being sold.

If you already own a Kindle, Nook, or Ipad you can purchase JUST the books without the Kindle for .00 and put them on your own device.

Call
Mary
(Please leave a message if I can’t pick up right away, and I will call you back as soon as possible) (This is a house phone and cannot receive text messages)

1) Abagnale, Frank W – Catch Me If You Can

Price: $ 145

Location

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as a SuperMale… LOL). I am not a lawyer,doctor or CEO of oil-company.In this case,99% of women could

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Lowering the Bar: Lawyer Jokes and Legal Culture
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The Street Lawyer


The Barnes & Noble Review The Street Lawyer is Grisham’s latest legal thriller, a gripping page-turner much like his earlier book The Firm. This latest outing delves into the often overlooked world of the homeless, from the perspective of an overworked young lawyer who has never ventured beyond his sheltered upper-middle-class life. His world turns upside down as he realizes, through a series of coincidences and a little homework, that the firm he has given his life to is hiding a secret that if public could ruin the firm’s unstained name. Thirty-two-year-old Michael Brock is rising quickly in the competitive ranks of the Washington, D.C., law firm Drake & Sweeney. He has a society wife in medical school, the perfect address in Georgetown, and a baby — his Lexus. All bodes well for a seven-figure future (yes, six doesn’t quite cut it anymore) until he looks down the barrel of a .44 and meets the eyes of a homeless gunman at the other end. Brock knows this is no joke — the gun seems ‘to be working fine; the smell of its discharge was more noticeable than the odor of its owner.’ The gunman, known to Brock only as Mister, takes nine hostages and holds them in a sixth-floor conference room for 12 hours, bound together with rope and lined up against a wall. And if the firearm fails to intimidate, a few pounds of dynamite are neatly strapped to the gunman’s chest, handily connected to a single wire for mass detonation. Mister doesn’t want money, stock options, or a Lexus — he seeks retribution. Ignored as a street bum, Mister commands attention at the firm as he turns his gun on eachofthe hostages. He demands to see the lawyers’ tax returns, and as the 1050s arduously scroll out of the fax machine, Brock is sure that someone will be shot. With the assurance a loaded firearm provides, Mister reprimands his hostages for the total lack of charitable contributions on

Price: $ 0.01
Sold by Barnes & Noble

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Denver, CO (PRWEB) April 24, 2012

Many legal professionals back government programs like pre-trial release as a substitute for private bail agents, but recently one former prosecutor and defense attorney declared his support for the bail industry. At the 2012 Professional Bail Agents of the United States (PBUS) Conference, the Honorable Judge John McBain spoke to attending agents about why he is an advocate of private bail, delivering some harsh criticism to legal entities that are not. During the conference, McBain sat down with AboutBail.com, a network of trusted bail agents, to discuss his views on pre-trial release, fugitive recovery and states that do not allow private bail.

?[The bail industry] gets no love,? he proclaimed, ?no real love from several critical stakeholders in the criminal justice system. Both the American Bar Association (ABA) and the National District of Attorneys and members of both professions have been vocal in their criticism of the bail bond business.? McBain pointed out that defense attorneys dislike private bail as the cost of bail translates to less money for a attorney fees, and noted that for any criticism the American Bar Association makes about private bail fees, they put little to no focus on the handsome and sometimes outrageous amount of attorney fees. He also noted for the record that as a former prosecutor and criminal defense attorney he?s worked both sides of the system.

McBain was quick to jump in with a declaration of support. ?I want you to know that the National Judges Association is not one of your critics,? he assured. ?In fact, we overwhelmingly support and understand the critical role that commercial bond agents play in the administration of our justice system.? Unsurprisingly, the statement garnered an overwhelming applause.

Later in his speech and as he sat down with AboutBail.com, McBain delved into industry issues to explain his support for private bail. With the trend of risk-assessment programs continuing to rise, so has the popularity of pre-trial release programs and personal recognizance (PR) bonds. ?What a joke [personal recognizance] bonds are,? McBain said with a shaking head, ?the criminal defendant show up when they want, no one tries to enforce them when they default, the cops don?t make meaningful efforts to pick up those individuals as a matter of high priority, and there are thousands of them pending in most jurisdictions.?

McBain noted the importance of efficient fugitive recovery in the justice process, describing a defendant out on bail as having a string that can be pulled back by the bondsman if he or she jumps bail. ?The few skips I get are usually reeled in by their bail agent very quickly,? he said, noting that skips on PR bonds are usually at large for years, which can have a detrimental effect on a court case. ?Criminal files are not like fine wines,? the judge examines, ?they don?t get better with age. And the more quickly you can process a case, the better result you?re going to get.? McBain outlines the importance of fugitive recovery, saying that justice is not served when a defendant skips on a bond and is not immediately recovered. ?Justice delayed is almost always justice denied,? he said, ?especially for crime victims.?

Washington D.C., Illinois, Kentucky, Massachusetts, Maine, Nebraska, Oregon, Wisconsin and Philadelphia do not allow private bail agents to operate, requiring applicants to go through the court. ?It?s really interesting,? McBain noted during his interview, ?the states that have abolished commercial for profit bonding have some of the most backlogged dockets, and now for the first time you?re even hearing prosecutors from Oregon, Wisconsin, Illinois and some of those states say, ?You know, I think we made a mistake.? In closing, McBain concluded that he wouldn?t be surprised to see many of those states change their position on private bail.

As a legal professional that has spent much of his career in the inner workings of the justice system, McBain assures that he has always been and will continue to be a strong supporter of private bail. In closing his interview with AboutBail.com, McBain said of government programs restricting and replacing bail bonds, ?I hate to see the government take over something that a commercial industry already does well, and cost-effectively with no taxpayer money involved.?

About AboutBail:

AboutBail.com, a subsidiary of Lawgical, is a nationwide directory of bail bond agents, criminal lawyers, investigators, immigration bondsmen and more. AboutBail.com?s comprehensive database of bail agents, and legal professionals provides users with instant access to the help they need.

AboutBail.com was created by the same founders of the PInow.com, a worldwide directory of Private Investigators, and ServeNow.com a directory of Professional Process Servers.

Contact:

Kimberly Faber

AboutBail.com

2854 Larimer Street

Denver, CO 80205

(866) 411-2245

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Lawyers: Jokes, Quotes, and Anecdotes

Lawyers: Jokes, Quotes, and Anecdotes

When the Bill Of Rights contains 297 words, and Lincoln’s Gettysburg Address has 266 words, but it takes 26,911 words for government legal eagles to spell out regulations on cabbage pricing, it’s esy to see that lawyers provide us with plenty of fodder for irony and hilarity. With the pages of Lawyers: Jokes, Quotes, and Anecdotes, readers will find hundreds of silly sayings, “insightful” interrogations, odd laws, and original knee-slapping jokes about a profession whose practitioners write 10

List Price: $ 9.95

Price: $ 98.71

Lowering the Bar: Lawyer Jokes and Legal Culture

Lowering the Bar: Lawyer Jokes and Legal Culture

What do you call 600 lawyers at the bottom of the sea? Marc Galanter calls it an opportunity to investigate the meanings of a rich and time-honored genre of American humor: lawyer jokes. Lowering the Bar analyzes hundreds of jokes from Mark Twain classics to contemporary anecdotes about Dan Quayle, Johnnie Cochran, and Kenneth Starr. Drawing on representations of law and lawyers in the mass media, political discourse, and public opinion surveys, Galanter finds that the increasing reliance on law

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Skidmarks: Common Jokes About Lawyers by Michael Rafferty 0898152836

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I hate writing Descriptions, But it is required. So have a nice day! I’m Not Sorry!
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New Kindle with 1164 books INCLUDED & Wifi (part 1)

I have a new Kindle for sale for 5 that comes programed with 1164 books. Please see book list below. I also have an additional 200 books that can be programed onto the kindle. These books are all bought from Amazon.com and are around .00 per book. This is an AMAZING deal. You are getting over ,672 in Kindle books along with the Kindle itself. (the book list is too long to fit in this ad and books #601-1164 had to be taken out for space requirements, but are listed in the next craigslist ad labeled “New Kindle with 1164 books (part 2)) The kindle shown in the picture below is the exact kindle model that is being sold.

If you already own a Kindle, Nook, or Ipad you can purchase JUST the books without the Kindle for .00 and put them on your own device.

Call
Mary
(Please leave a message if I can’t pick up right away, and I will call you back as soon as possible) (This is a house phone and cannot receive text messages)

1) Abagnale, Frank W – Catch Me If You Can

Price: $ 145

Location

Jacksonville, USA

Are u ready for love ?

as a SuperMale… LOL). I am not a lawyer,doctor or CEO of oil-company.In this case,99% of women could

Price:

Location

54211 Ephraim, USA

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Denver, CO (PRWEB) April 24, 2012

Many legal professionals back government programs like pre-trial release as a substitute for private bail agents, but recently one former prosecutor and defense attorney declared his support for the bail industry. At the 2012 Professional Bail Agents of the United States (PBUS) Conference, the Honorable Judge John McBain spoke to attending agents about why he is an advocate of private bail, delivering some harsh criticism to legal entities that are not. During the conference, McBain sat down with AboutBail.com, a network of trusted bail agents, to discuss his views on pre-trial release, fugitive recovery and states that do not allow private bail.

?[The bail industry] gets no love,? he proclaimed, ?no real love from several critical stakeholders in the criminal justice system. Both the American Bar Association (ABA) and the National District of Attorneys and members of both professions have been vocal in their criticism of the bail bond business.? McBain pointed out that defense attorneys dislike private bail as the cost of bail translates to less money for a attorney fees, and noted that for any criticism the American Bar Association makes about private bail fees, they put little to no focus on the handsome and sometimes outrageous amount of attorney fees. He also noted for the record that as a former prosecutor and criminal defense attorney he?s worked both sides of the system.

McBain was quick to jump in with a declaration of support. ?I want you to know that the National Judges Association is not one of your critics,? he assured. ?In fact, we overwhelmingly support and understand the critical role that commercial bond agents play in the administration of our justice system.? Unsurprisingly, the statement garnered an overwhelming applause.

Later in his speech and as he sat down with AboutBail.com, McBain delved into industry issues to explain his support for private bail. With the trend of risk-assessment programs continuing to rise, so has the popularity of pre-trial release programs and personal recognizance (PR) bonds. ?What a joke [personal recognizance] bonds are,? McBain said with a shaking head, ?the criminal defendant show up when they want, no one tries to enforce them when they default, the cops don?t make meaningful efforts to pick up those individuals as a matter of high priority, and there are thousands of them pending in most jurisdictions.?

McBain noted the importance of efficient fugitive recovery in the justice process, describing a defendant out on bail as having a string that can be pulled back by the bondsman if he or she jumps bail. ?The few skips I get are usually reeled in by their bail agent very quickly,? he said, noting that skips on PR bonds are usually at large for years, which can have a detrimental effect on a court case. ?Criminal files are not like fine wines,? the judge examines, ?they don?t get better with age. And the more quickly you can process a case, the better result you?re going to get.? McBain outlines the importance of fugitive recovery, saying that justice is not served when a defendant skips on a bond and is not immediately recovered. ?Justice delayed is almost always justice denied,? he said, ?especially for crime victims.?

Washington D.C., Illinois, Kentucky, Massachusetts, Maine, Nebraska, Oregon, Wisconsin and Philadelphia do not allow private bail agents to operate, requiring applicants to go through the court. ?It?s really interesting,? McBain noted during his interview, ?the states that have abolished commercial for profit bonding have some of the most backlogged dockets, and now for the first time you?re even hearing prosecutors from Oregon, Wisconsin, Illinois and some of those states say, ?You know, I think we made a mistake.? In closing, McBain concluded that he wouldn?t be surprised to see many of those states change their position on private bail.

As a legal professional that has spent much of his career in the inner workings of the justice system, McBain assures that he has always been and will continue to be a strong supporter of private bail. In closing his interview with AboutBail.com, McBain said of government programs restricting and replacing bail bonds, ?I hate to see the government take over something that a commercial industry already does well, and cost-effectively with no taxpayer money involved.?

About AboutBail:

AboutBail.com, a subsidiary of Lawgical, is a nationwide directory of bail bond agents, criminal lawyers, investigators, immigration bondsmen and more. AboutBail.com?s comprehensive database of bail agents, and legal professionals provides users with instant access to the help they need.

AboutBail.com was created by the same founders of the PInow.com, a worldwide directory of Private Investigators, and ServeNow.com a directory of Professional Process Servers.

Contact:

Kimberly Faber

AboutBail.com

2854 Larimer Street

Denver, CO 80205

(866) 411-2245

The Street Lawyer


The Barnes & Noble Review The Street Lawyer is Grisham’s latest legal thriller, a gripping page-turner much like his earlier book The Firm. This latest outing delves into the often overlooked world of the homeless, from the perspective of an overworked young lawyer who has never ventured beyond his sheltered upper-middle-class life. His world turns upside down as he realizes, through a series of coincidences and a little homework, that the firm he has given his life to is hiding a secret that if public could ruin the firm’s unstained name. Thirty-two-year-old Michael Brock is rising quickly in the competitive ranks of the Washington, D.C., law firm Drake & Sweeney. He has a society wife in medical school, the perfect address in Georgetown, and a baby — his Lexus. All bodes well for a seven-figure future (yes, six doesn’t quite cut it anymore) until he looks down the barrel of a .44 and meets the eyes of a homeless gunman at the other end. Brock knows this is no joke — the gun seems ‘to be working fine; the smell of its discharge was more noticeable than the odor of its owner.’ The gunman, known to Brock only as Mister, takes nine hostages and holds them in a sixth-floor conference room for 12 hours, bound together with rope and lined up against a wall. And if the firearm fails to intimidate, a few pounds of dynamite are neatly strapped to the gunman’s chest, handily connected to a single wire for mass detonation. Mister doesn’t want money, stock options, or a Lexus — he seeks retribution. Ignored as a street bum, Mister commands attention at the firm as he turns his gun on eachofthe hostages. He demands to see the lawyers’ tax returns, and as the 1050s arduously scroll out of the fax machine, Brock is sure that someone will be shot. With the assurance a loaded firearm provides, Mister reprimands his hostages for the total lack of charitable contributions on

Price: $ 0.01
Sold by Barnes & Noble

Clever Lawyer On Duty Sign (Female)
This sign is part of the “On Duty” series, highlighting various professions and interests. It’s a sure-fire way to please that per…
Lowering the Bar: Lawyer Jokes and Legal Culture
What do you call 600 lawyers at the bottom of the sea? Marc Galanter calls it an opportunity to investigate the meanings of a rich…

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